5 min read

嫁个有钱人

刚在“槽边往事”看到这篇好玩的东西,《如何嫁个有人钱2007版》,转载美国的Craigslist社区的一个帖子,一个年轻女子问如何能嫁一个年薪50万的人,然后一个自称年薪50万的男子回帖,说了一个转载率颇高的句子”in economic terms you are a depreciating asset and I am an earning asset.“,都非常好玩。接着在Urban Legends and Folklore看到一个更具描述性的标题Single Female Seeks Marriageable Rich Guy; Rich Guy Says ‘No Deal’。以下英文就来自Urban Legends and Folklore,不完全的中文翻译来自“槽边往事”,原帖讨论见lemmingtrail

What am I doing wrong?

  <p>
    Okay, I&#8217;m tired of beating around the bush. I&#8217;m a beautiful (spectacularly beautiful) 25 year old girl. I&#8217;m articulate and classy. I&#8217;m not from New York. I&#8217;m looking to get married to a guy who makes at least half a million a year. I know how that sounds, but keep in mind that a million a year is middle class in New York City , so I don&#8217;t think I&#8217;m overreaching at all.
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    Are there any guys who make 500K or more on this board? Any wives? Could you send me some tips? I dated a business man who makes average around 100 &#8211; 150. But that&#8217;s where I seem to hit a roadblock. 150,000 won&#8217;t get me to central park west. I know a woman in my yoga class who was married to an investment banker and lives in Tribeca, and she&#8217;s not as pretty as I am, nor is she a great genius. So what is she doing right? How do I get to her level?
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    Here are my questions specifically:
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    &#8211; Where do you single rich men hang out? Give me specifics- bars, restaurants, gyms
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    -What are you looking for in a mate? Be honest guys, you won&#8217;t hurt my feelings
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    -Is there an age range I should be targeting (I&#8217;m 25)?
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    &#8211; Why are some of the women living lavish lifestyles on the upper east side so plain? I&#8217;ve seen really &#8216;plain jane&#8217; boring types who have nothing to offer married to incredibly wealthy guys. I&#8217;ve seen drop dead gorgeous girls in singles bars in the east village. What&#8217;s the story there?
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    &#8211; Jobs I should look out for? Everyone knows &#8211; lawyer, investment banker, doctor. How much do those guys really make? And where do they hang out? Where do the hedge fund guys hang out?
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    &#8211; How you decide marriage vs. just a girlfriend? I am looking for MARRIAGE ONLY
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  <p>
    Please hold your insults &#8211; I&#8217;m putting myself out there in an honest way. Most beautiful women are superficial; at least I&#8217;m being up front about it. I wouldn&#8217;t be searching for these kind of guys if I wasn&#8217;t able to match them &#8211; in looks, culture, sophistication, and keeping a nice home and hearth.
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    _______________________________
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    THE ANSWER
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  <p>
    Dear Pers-:
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  <p>
    I read your posting with great interest and have thought meaningfully about your dilemma. I offer the following analysis of your predicament. Firstly, I&#8217;m not wasting your time, I qualify as a guy who fits your bill; that is I make more than $500K per year. That said here&#8217;s how I see it.
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    Your offer, from the prospective of a guy like me, is plain and simple a crappy business deal. Here&#8217;s why. Cutting through all the B.S., what you suggest is a simple trade: you bring your looks to the party and I bring my money. Fine, simple. But here&#8217;s the rub, your looks will fade and my money will likely continue into perpetuity&#8230;in fact, it is very likely that my income increases but it is an absolute certainty that you won&#8217;t be getting any more beautiful!
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  <p>
    So, in economic terms you are a depreciating asset and I am an earning asset. Not only are you a depreciating asset, your depreciation accelerates! Let me explain, you&#8217;re 25 now and will likely stay pretty hot for the next 5 years, but less so each year. Then the fade begins in earnest. By 35 stick a fork in you!
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  <p>
    So in Wall Street terms, we would call you a trading position, not a buy and hold&#8230;hence the rub&#8230;marriage. It doesn&#8217;t make good business sense to "buy you" (which is what you&#8217;re asking) so I&#8217;d rather lease. In case you think I&#8217;m being cruel, I would say the following. If my money were to go away, so would you, so when your beauty fades I need an out. It&#8217;s as simple as that. So a deal that makes sense is dating, not marriage.
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  <p>
    Separately, I was taught early in my career about efficient markets. So, I wonder why a girl as "articulate, classy and spectacularly beautiful" as you has been unable to find your sugar daddy. I find it hard tobelieve that if you are as gorgeous as you say you are that the $500K hasn&#8217;t found you, if not only for a tryout.
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    By the way, you could always find a way to make your own money and then we wouldn&#8217;t need to have this difficult conversation.
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    With all that said, I must say you&#8217;re going about it the right way. Classic "pump and dump."<br />I hope this is helpful, and if you want to enter into some sort of lease, let me know.
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  <p>
    ____________ <br />Rob Campbell <br />J.P.Morgan <br />Diversified Industrials Investment Banking <br />277 Park Avenue, 16/F, New York , NY 10172
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  <p>
    <strong>主贴:《我做错了什么?》</strong>
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    “我下面要说的都是心里话。本人25岁,非常漂亮,谈吐文雅,有品位,想嫁给年薪50万美元的人。你也许会说我贪心,但在纽约年薪100万才算是中产,本人的要求其实不高。
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  <p>
    这个版上有没有年薪超过50万的人?你们都结婚了吗?我想请教各位一个问题—怎样才能嫁给你们这样的有钱人?我约会过的人中,最有钱的年薪25万,这似乎是我的上限。要住进纽约中心公园以西的高尚住宅区,年薪25万远远不够。我是来诚心诚意请教的。有几个具体的问题:
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    一、有钱的单身汉一般都在哪里消磨时光?(请列出酒吧、饭店、健身房的名字和详细地址。)<br />二、我应该把目标定在哪个年龄段?<br />三、为什么有些富豪的妻子看起来相貌平平?我见过有些女孩,长相如同白开水,毫无吸引人的地方,但她们却能嫁入豪门。而单身酒吧里那些迷死人的美女却运气不佳。<br />四、你们怎么决定谁能做妻子,谁只能做女朋友?(我现在的目标是结婚。)
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    —波尔斯女士
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    <strong></strong>  <strong>___________________</strong>
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    <strong>回帖:</strong>
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  <p>
    “亲爱的波尔斯:我怀着极大的兴趣看完了贵帖,相信不少女士也有跟你类似的疑问。让我以一个投资专家的身份,对你的处境做一分析。我年薪超过50万,符合你的择偶标准,所以请相信我并不是在浪费大家的时间。
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  <p>
    从生意人的角度来看,跟你结婚是个糟糕的经营决策,道理再明白不过,请听我解释。抛开细枝末节,你所说的其实是一笔简单的“财”“貌”交易:甲方提供迷人的外表,乙方出钱,公平交易,童叟无欺。但是,这里有个致命的问题,你的美貌会消逝,但我的钱却不会无缘无故减少。事实上,我的收入很可能会逐年递增,但你不可能一年比一年漂亮。
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  <p>
    因此,从经济学的角度讲,我是增值资产,你是贬值资产,不但贬值,而且是加速贬值!你现
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